Today I was charged with ‘dangerous driving’. Apparently I didn’t give way when turning onto a roundabout. Funny – given the number of times I have had to slam on my brakes whilst already ON a roundabout, I thought the rule was to drive headlong onto them and then give way to approaching vehicles.
Anyway, I was pulled over by the police station and even though I knew I had done nothing wrong, I realised I was standing on shaky ground. I still have my UK licence as I haven’t got the foggiest how you are supposed to trade it in for the Ugandan version and my car is still not registered in my name for the same reason. I decided to suck it up and cut my losses.
The police lady filled in the form and asked when I was going to go to the bank to pay the fine. Well, there is no time like the present, so I decided it would be easier to get it done there and then. So Madam Police-lady got in the car and we drove up to the bank so I could pay my debt to society.
As we drove up the hill the heavens opened and the traffic thickened. I suggested parking at the shopping centre across the road, as I feared being charged for yet another driving offence, should I park in the wrong manner.
“But Madam,” says the WPC, “ it is raining, we will get dirty!”
Thus ensued a discussion over the Ugandan traffic police uniform – pure white, gloves and all. She told me it was a total nightmare and that she had to soak it all day and scrub for hours with plenty of Omo to get it clean. I suggested they change their uniform to a colour more suited to the Ugandan environment, dusty orange perhaps! She thought it was a good idea.
As it was after 2pm on a Saturday, I wondered whether the bank would still be open. I was in luck. This particular branch has extended hours to cope with the numerous traffic fines they receive each day. The bank teller told me they process over thirty traffic fines a day!
Minutes later and forty-two thousand Shillings worse off I handed the slip to the policewoman and she set off, clipboard in hand, to snare more drivers. Let’s hope she stopped some of the less innocent ones next time …
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